I can’t make you love me, if you don’t

Over the past few days, I have been listening to the Priyanka Chopra’s ‘I Can’t Make You Love Me’ a lot. People who know me, knows that I love Priyanka Chopra a lot and not only because she is one of the hottest actress of our times but also because of her versatility and her being the strong woman who can stand up for her own rights. Well, here’s the video of Piggy Chop’s ‘I Can’t Make You Love Me’.

This song made me think about love. Yayyy! Chaotic Soul’s favorite topic!!! But this love is a different kind. We all love someone and have been in love stories that have been incomplete at some point in our lives. The most hurtful kind of love is the ‘one-sided love’. It is completely OK if the person we love isn’t in love with us, that’s acceptable because they are unaware of our feelings and hence this one doesn’t have the negative impact on us. But what about the love stories wherein you love someone and the person you love is using you for something. They don’t love you, but they are with you. The reasons could be anything.

Maybe a person whom you love, is with you because you are paying their bills, satisfying them in the bed, being with you means a promotion ahead, you are their only pay check, you are a trophy GF/BF for all those awkward social gatherings where they have been going alone, all this while or maybe they are with you because they want to get closer to someone you know. It could be anything. And all the people sitting there in denial and saying “Naah! My beau loves me for who I am!” Well baby, you aren’t Bridget Jones and he isn’t Mark Darcy, so please keep that to yourself, because if he really loves you, you wouldn’t have read this post so far.

Now guys, I love you all but you know me, I have a different kind of love with you guys, and I love being honest and at times that means being brutal. All that being said, let’s get back to the topic.

It is sad to see some of you to be so much in love with the person who gives a damn about your feelings and is screwing you in all ways possible. Don’t be so available. I know it’s easier said than done, but believe me it is necessary – for your peace of mind. I have seen and been with people who were with me or wanted to be with me because I was on a great position in the company I worked in or because my bank balance is better than theirs or because I was a complete mess after I get drunk (which is good for a few guys). I have been and seen relationships where girls are been screwed up to the level that the girls’ don’t like to see themselves in the mirror. It is very disheartening because we hope ‘One Day’ she/he will understand my love. Sadly, that ‘one day’ never comes and will never come.

Let me tell you guys a story:

“There was a girl who loved a guy very much, more than she could ever have thought. This girl never believed in love, but this guy made her fall in love till the level where she couldn’t see anything beyond him and his happiness. There came a time when the girl realized the boy is nothing but a sex and substance addict. And she was nothing but the one to provide with the finances, for all his substance arrangement and she was the one who always had to arrange and spend for all the overnight dates they have ever been to. Even the protection bought by them was of her money. However, the girl was blind in love and ruined her life for his happiness. There came a time when the girl had it enough and decided to break it up with the guy because she couldn’t feel his love (pretentious love) anymore. He tried to come into her life every now and then because he is a sex and substance addict and she was his only convenient option. The girl still loves him but she realized that he is toxic for her life. She is trying to keep him away, but again she loved him.”

This girl loved him but the guy never did. She was only an option for him. Is this my story? Believe it or no but this is the story of every person who has loved someone unconditionally and the person used them royally. Is it okay to play with someone’s feelings? Do you want to know what happened to the girl in the story above?

“She was in a state of denial just like all of us, but once she realized it was she who was a fool, she decided to cut off from him completely. She survived the first day after hours of crying. The second day she felt like talking to him, but she instead spoke to her friends and family. Eventually, she turned out to be a complete mess and a person whom people started hating. The worst part was when she started hating herself for being so ‘not herself’. She couldn’t smile genuinely, she couldn’t hear a single song that didn’t remind her of him, and she looked at every buzz on her phone waiting for his phone. She still wanted him to call and tell her he loved her as much she does. Eventually she ended up being one of the girls who are reading this post (that includes me). She moved on but still can’t forget her love for him. She still doesn’t like herself as much she used to once upon a time.”

So can we make someone love us who doesn’t love us? No, we can’t.

Is it sensible to be in a relationship and keep hoping they will feel for us the same way as we do for them, one day…? Technically, No!!! But if you want to give it a shot, go ahead but 90% of the chances are they won’t realize what love is, unless they miss it.

Anyway, this was my opinion on ‘I can’t make you love me, if you don’t’. If yours is different or if there’s something I haven’t covered, please comment below.

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