Blame Game is the most widely played game across the world. In school when teacher asked: “Who threw the paper?” They said: “It’s your fault!” In college when parents asked: “Who asked you to go out with such friends?” They themselves said: “It’s your fault!” At work when Manager asked: “Whom should I blame for this loss that’s been done by someone I don’t know.” They said: “It’s your Fault.” After marriage when Mother asked: “What should I tell the society…? My daughter left her house because…? Whom should I blame for this?” They said: “It’s your fault.”
It is always our fault. In school, college, work, marriage and life it is just one person to be blamed for all the wrong things that happens…? It’s you. The society will always blame you for whatever you do. If you are out there expecting some words of sympathy when you are sad or tormented or vulnerable all people would give you is the patent dialogue: “IT’S YOUR FAULT” and indeed it is your fault. Why do you go to the society for some sympathy? Why do you need a shoulder to cry on? Why do you think you should be vulnerable? Why do you think people will love you? Why do you think at all?
It is wiser to not tell people what you are going through rather than take their criticism when all you need is a shoulder to rest your head and cry on.
You are the Girl of Today who shouldn’t cry on a break up? Is that what the society telling you? Well it’s the same story. If you break up then you’re foolish. If he breaks up then you must have done something wrong. If you cry after a break up you’ll most probably hear this– “Now what’s the use of crying? You should’ve thought of it before.” If you don’t cry after a break up, then you can hear this – “After a long relationship of Four Years all you do is listen to songs and spending time reading those useless books?!? Strange how the girls of this generation are.”
Break ups can be hard if the people around you care more for you than the jerk that broke your heart.
All people say is ‘it’s your fault.’ Well actually it is.
1. It is your fault because: You let people know about your relationship at the first place.
2. It is your fault because: You fell in love with the person who was wrong for you all the way long and you knew it.
3. It is your fault because: You saw dreams of a future with the Jerk.
4. It is your fault because: You knew he was cheating but you gave him one last chance every time.
5. It is your fault because: You let your Love take the lead and not your – Self Respect.
6. It is your fault because: You gave someone more importance than required.
7. It is you fault because: You didn’t take the crap from that person and decided to move on.
8. It is your fault because: You chose yourself before your lover.
9. It is your fault because: You decided not to give up and rather break up.
10. It is your fault because: You decided to share your pain with family and friends.
11. It is your fault because: You decided to cry.
These 11 it’s your faults are true. All of these are sarcastically true and this happens every time you have a heart break.
People will never comfort you but rather will criticize you and try to take you down so that you eventually die with shame and guilt. What Guilt? Breaking up with a guy?
How difficult is it for people to understand that at times PEOPLE just need to keep quiet and not say a word? Maybe it is difficult! In fact I have noticed this weird tendency in people – when one has a break up and is tormented, PEOPLE will talk to them and tell them what went wrong. She knows what went wrong and that’s the reason she broke up with him! The other tendency is – when one has been through a break up but looks NORMAL, Smiling and chirpy, People will talk to them and torture them by asking them to be vulnerable.
You know what when its break up time for someone, let that person decide what he/she wants. If they want to be left alone they won’t ask you to join them for a walk with music or share the couch with a book. But if they need your advice and support they will ask you to join them for coffee. I need the Me Time after a break up. I am sure there are more people who needs some alone time and needs to cry so that the next day at work they can act normal and strong. There are people who are strong on the outside but needs to break down in the closed room and yell and cry till the tears dry up and they fall asleep.
I would request people to handle people with fresh break ups with a delicate heart and soft words. Try to understand that It is not a GIRL’S FAULT EVERY TIME.
Keep Reading! Keep Blogging! Keep Being Yourself and Keep Crying if necessary! Be Strong!
For me it is not anybody’s fault if you feel both that the relationship you are having right now is not working and you need to choose the separate ways. It is best to ended up while the respect is still there than breaking up in a worse situation.
Relationship is like a journey, you explore each other, knowing better and trials and difficulties is always part of it. Only the two individuals whose on that relationship knew better what is best because when you go deeper and decided to be together for the rest of your life it is the point that you know each other well.
Letting go for someone you love is hard and painful but if it is for the best, try to accept it with open mind and with positive goal that in next time it will be better.
Whatever the reason and circumstances, try to be strong and if you feel you need a cry just let it out. Sending hugs and love… Lane
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I don’t take break ups too seriously. i believe in ‘it happened because it had to happen’ Maybe a bad thing but that is how i am… so me crying over someone for days is SO Not me… 😛 Moving on is my motto after a break up!
Love,
Chaotic Soul
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I agree with the “blame game” and “it your fault” thing, but there could be another facet to this. You could be the one breaking up.. but not because he cheated on you or something, it could be because you just dont feel the spark anymore.. or you’ve realised after spending a long time with that person, that its just not what you want in life and that you and your partner’s priorities now just dont match.
Its a great post by the way.. but I would like your view on this facet of the break up as well.. keep those blogs coming.. I love them!! 😀 Also give my regards to Aunty! 🙂
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https://chaoticsoulzzz.wordpress.com/2013/09/30/another-facet-of-a-break-up/
And, gave regards to Mom! 😉
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