At times it’s more than people blaming you, it’s you who think that people are blaming you. “Come-on! Get over the self-obsession Mita”, this is what I tell myself when this happens. Rightly said by someone close to me, ‘the more you think of the worse, the more more worse would happen to you.’ don’t let the engine of your mind run to think, who said this! Well it was an ex-crush of mine!
So a day started on a bad note is nothing but a string of bad luck. Something we say turn out to be totally wrong! Even if you don’t want to mean wrong it is considered to be wrong, or even worse UNDERSTOOD to be Wrong! It’s nothing but psychological. You think what you’ve said wasn’t wrong and that is true – what you said wasn’t wrong but the tone might be, or the time might be. What are we supposed to do in that case? Nothing! All you could do is keep your silence!
So my mantra to lead a good day today is to keep my lips joined the whole time. Will talk only the things those are necessary and essential for my work. I am sure that today with this pissed off mood, I might tell someone something I shouldn’t say, so instead of going into the SORRY mode later it’s better to keep my mouth shut.
Mom, thinks what i say or do is most of the time wrong and she has to tell me everything! It is a good thing, but I am 22 and I am supposed to take wrong decisions in my life. I don’t want to have a life that wouldn’t have wrong decisions. I wish I could tell this to my mom. I know what she wants is to see me lead a happy life but a few wrong decisions in life can make my life happier and exciting.
My brother thinks, I manipulate him! True – I do that and don’t you think every DIDI does that. But does that mean that we should stop talking to our sisters? Doesn’t make sense. I wish I could tell him this.
Never mind. In life we have such things that we can never tell anyone. Just like so many of us must’ve kept the special feelings for that special someone but mustn’t have said because we loved them so much that just by saying ‘I love you’ we didn’t want to lose the friendship.
Don’t blame me, my genre is LOVE and Relationships, so no matter what you can’t take out my love for love writing from me! That defines me!
So keeping quiet is my mantra for the day. no extra laughs and smiles and no stares at all.
Stares remind me of saying that, unfortunately all the problems start with my eyes. I stare at a person to make him/her realize that I ma angry. I stare at a person with love when I love them. I stare at guys in the most flirtatious ways whom I like as eye candies – I do! I stare at something (actually anything!) when I am sad. So I think I should skip the staring part today. I know how seductive my Bengali eyes are (not trying to brag about it! Actually I am! But the fact is I have beautiful eyes! I know!) and so I should skip the part today as it can give wrong signals to people and also could lead to more misunderstandings!
Though my day is about to come to an end as I came from shift two hours ago, but I hope that my day is sober enough for me to survive this day. Well I have to take the steps to stop more misunderstandings my keeping my silence.
So silently people – Good Night!